


Love, Indifference and the Apocalypse

by toziedus



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alcohol, Alternate Universe - 1980s, Alternate Universe - 1990s, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Fix-It, Homophobia, M/M, Spoilers, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-16
Updated: 2020-02-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:34:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22747135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toziedus/pseuds/toziedus
Summary: Richie had a bad temper. That was a fact known by his friends and had become simply another characteristic.But the way odd numbers left him, the way they made him squirm in bed at three in the morning and scratch his neck tirelessly during math, that was scary.Still, what was even scarier to him was trying to relate the strange and spikey odd numbers to the familiar and kind Eddie K.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 1
Kudos: 6





	1. Pocket-sized Apocalypse

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [O Amor, A Indiferença e O Apocalipse](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/559717) by Ed_Doggo. 



> Howdy y'all  
> Here's a chronological order for the chapters:
> 
> – 1987-89 - Chapter 1 (+ 13 years old)  
> – 1989 - Chapter 2 (13 years old)  
> – 1990 - 2017's movie (14 years old)  
> – 1992 - Chapter 3 (16 years old)  
> – 2009 - Chapter 4 happens before the 2019's movie (30 years old)  
> – 2019 - Chapter 5 will be divided in two parts, the middle and end of the 2019's movie (40 years old)

_Cause you're the, cutest thing on this side of the world._

_We call our homes, yet I feel so all alone._

_Half of the time, we gotta live with what we got, and I got nothing._

_So agree to take my hand, so we can conjour up with something rad._

**first dance - nevershoutnever**

××

The wet steps followed by dissatisfied grunts brought an image to Tozier's head. He would love to see Eddie walk awkwardly across the mossy floor full of puddles of bleach, for sure.

He couldn't remember how or where it started, but seeing Eddie acting 'oh so brave' was his incredibly fun - like an apocalypse small enough to fit in his pocket. For some, it was an exaggerated and quite silly expression, but for both it was simply an inside joke.

The boy entered the bathroom properly and marched to the other with a pouty lip. Richie was sitting next to the sink, his legs dangling from the edge where had been hail before.

\- What is it now, Rich? - he had an aggressive tone, something common in their interactions. The older one just looked him up and down as usual and smirked.

\- I need help with the next math test. You're one of the bests in that regard. - Richie said, looking at the plants that invaded the place through the window as he crossed his arms and leaned against the wall.

\- Look, if it's gonna end up as a mess and make me stay in detention with you again, I'll pass. - Eddie grunted, leaning next to Tozier, his hands carefully placed where the moss and dirt hadn't reached yet. - Plus, you're pretty good at math as well. Why do you want help?

\- I don't know, I guess I wanted to spend more time with you. We hardly play video games together. - He sighed, and made his best puppy dog eyes. Eddie laughed in response, pushing the other's face away with his hand.

\- I saw you yesterday at the arcade, you little shit! - Kaspbrak blushed as the other pulled his arm and hugged him.

\- Look, Eds--

\- Don't fucking call me Eds. - the boy protested immediately, but was ignored.

\- Don't tell Bill, but you're my best friend, y'know? I don't like being far from you, it feels like everything is going wrong. - there was a brief but comfortable silence between the two of them. Something simple and good.

\- Thank you, Rich. You're my best friend too. Even though I sometimes want you to die, now let me go! - Richie laughed again and released him.

\- No worries Eds, that's part of the process.

The two left the abandoned bathroom (it was behind the school, had been replaced but every teenager went there now and then) and rode their bikes to Richie's house. As soon as they got there, Tozier's mother greeted them cheerfully, simply asking how the boy's were feeling and about Eddie's mother. She quickly ended the conversation and turned her attention to the papers she was writing on, listening to a continuous whispering along with quick steps to the top floor.

Both boys threw their backpacks on the untidy bed - Richie out of habit and Eddie for just not giving a damn. As Tozier opened his book and showed each equation he pretended to be confusing and strange, Kaspbrak wondered if Richie really needed help, and if they were there just to study. He would never, in a million years, reveal that last doubt, which for him was like the end of the world but at the same time hopeful.

Every second their fingers touched as they passed erasers to each other, the relentless laughter, the moments when they admired one without the other's knowledge; each of these moments were sacred to both. In a decisive but useless move Richie tried to hold the other's hand and had an uncomfortable response. Eddie had his cheeks red and was slightly out of breath.

He got up immediately and looked at his watch. It was 5:35 pm, his mother wanted him to return 5 minutes earlier. The younger said goodbye and with a wan smile, as if trying to cooperate with someone else's loss, said he would see his friend the next day.

During the night, Tozier could barely sleep. He hadn't had a proper dinner either, to make thing worse. Those numbers were just like Eddie. They seemed so simple to understand, yet Richie was never sure about being on the right track. He dialed the R/E station (a name obviously created by Richie, who confirmed every subtext as a joke) for the seventh time, waiting for an answer.

"Is he okay? What if he had a problem on his way home? Would his inhaler work if he needed it? Oh, fuck, what happened? Why won't he answer me?!"

And it was on September 13, the fifth day of the week, at 1:15 am, without hearing an answer to his seventh call, that Richie felt his first complete aversion to odd numbers, and his complete attraction to Edward Kaspbrak, his classmate at various times, and his best friend at all of them.

When he realized it he closed his eyes and buried his face in the pillow, releasing a muffled "oh, shit ..." against it.


	2. Hit to Kill

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warnings!  
> \- violence  
> \- blood  
> \- homophobic slurs

_I don't wanna go to school tomorrow_

_I can't study_

_Thinking about you_

_And you know I always do_

_I don't wanna go to sleep tonight when I can stay up_

_Thinking about you_

_And you know I always do_

**Malboro Nights - Lonely God**

**××**

\- Ready to see the best movie of your life, _Eduardo_? - Richie asked, with a Cuban accent, putting his baseball bat in his backpack. He had found it at the edge of a lake near Barrens and it was just too cool to leave it behind, so he would use it to crush some rotten fruits or bugs in the middle of the woods. - I'm sure you'll piss your pants as soon as Michael Myers shows up.

\- Shut up, Rich. We still have about 2 hours. But I'm kinda excited to see the movie. - The short one gave a small smile and returned his gaze to the ground.

Richie looked at his own hands on the bicycle handlebars, at Eddie, then at his hands again. He hadn't forgotten the problem about odd numbers, on the contrary.

It was September 17th, less than a week had passed, but every second next to Eddie seemed like a millimeter closer to the Sun. He knew he would eventually burn himself, so he'd better fix the problem soon.

\- Eddie, I--

Richie started, but then stopped his sentence immediately. Although they were side by side, Kaspbrak took the lead since they were passing through a smaller area: the kissing bridge. It would be all right, if the boy hadn't froze as soon as he saw Henry Bowers sitting on the bridge (and, surprisingly enough, without his gang), scratching his knife over the names on it.

\- Eds, what are you doing ?! Come back here! - Richie whispered, pulling the shorter by the shirt. It was in vain; Kaspbrak dropped the bike and the noise caught Bowers' attention, who turned with a sinister smile.

\- If it isn't the city's least favorite faggot. - The blonde held the knife firmly approaching the boy at the end of the bridge, who was desperately trying to lift his bicycle.

\- Geeze, did you think of that alone or did you need help from your dad? - Richard scoffed as he crossed his arms and left his backpack on the ground, standing between the other two boys.

\- You came quickly to defend your boyfriend, huh Tozier? - He laughed, winking at Eddie, who shrank although he tried to appear brave.

\- Why don't you fight someone your size, asshole? Say it, puppy, you gonna bark forever, or you gonna _bite_?

With the sentence, Henry curved his eyebrows, pulled the one with glasses by the collar of his Hawaiian shirt and punched him hard in the middle of his cheek. The boy, bent over and with his hands on his knee, was breathing heavily. He ran his hand over his mouth, drawing the blood that came out of his sudden bruise and adjusted his glasses.

\- Is that the best you can do?

Richie jumped towards the knife, trying to catch it, taking a cut on his arm in response. However, he was able to drop Henry on the floor, which caused the object to be thrown away by the blonde, far from the two of them.

The punches and kicks were almost countless but always strong. Richie tried to punch Bowers in the chest and face, but he knew that if there was no intervention, he would end up with a huge cut somewhere, a broken limb and two completely black eyes.

He had counted until he was hit in the middle of the chest and kneeled on top of the other to fight back. Five punches. His Broken glasses. Three kicks on his knees. The fucking odd numbers attacked again.

Meanwhile, Eddie was frozen. That image had left him even more paralyzed, at a point where he questioned whether he should really take the abandoned knife and attack Henry or if he should use his own hands.

The thoughts were interrupted by a strange noise. It was different from the crackle of muscles, the grunts of pain and the soles of shoes. It was a strong, prolonged thud. He directed his attention to the dark-haired boy lying on the floor, with bloody face and fists, his glasses broken in half and his voice cracked and hoarse, calling out a brief " _Eddie_..."

The boy, wide-eyed, noticed Bowers breathing hard, almost as if he was waking up. With a few steps back as an instinct, he felt a solid object touch his leg. He stared at the bat for a few seconds until he realized that maybe, just maybe, he could hit that son of a bitch.

He took it out of the backpack and held it tightly. He walked slowly over to the blonde, waiting for him to open his eyes. He did, giving a short smile.

\- Are you going to hit me, faggot? Huh, you shit?! Are you really going to hit me?! Then you better do it right, you weirdo! - He shouted, his muscles burning, and his bruises even more. - You better hit me straight at once! You better hit to kill!

With the screams, Richie opened his eyes as well. His head hurt, and the sunlight made his eyes sting. He put his hand slowly over his eyes and was startled by the image of Kaspbrak holding his bat menacingly against Henry. 

"He can't be beaten up. If his mother finds out she'll be pissed! How am I going to protect him? I don't even know how to protect myself! He's going to die in this fight! He's going to -"

\- Don't worry, Henry. - The blonde smirked when Eddie swung the bat hard against his arms, leaving him in pain - I'll let mother nature do the dirty work.

Eddie turned to Richie, who was discredited. He lifted the boy up and ran out of that situation on his bike, with Richie's red backpack in front of his body and the bat stuck inside it. Eddie took him to the abandoned bathroom. The fear of getting an infection had been replaced by the fear of losing Richie.

As they entered, Eddie helped Richie sit in the clean section near the sink, shocked by the injuries and by Richie not speaking more than he usually did. He repeated phrases like " _That was awesome_ " and " _Holy shit, Eds_ " very low.

\- Ok Rich, I'm going to wipe your face with a cloth to get all that blood out, let me know if it burns. - He took a box of handkerchiefs from the pouch and cleaned Tozier's face, who occasionally let out an " _oh, fuck_ " or bit his lip to hold the burning. - Calm the fuck down, it will get better if you try to relax.

\- That's what I said to your mom last night-- ouch! I loved to see you swinging that stick, if you get what I mean. - he smiled, watching the other boy's face get in a light red tone. - You looked so badass. Ouch, ouch, yikes... I always knew you were brave, Eds!

\- Fuck, you talk too much, did y'know that?! - The youngest replied, receiving a cheerful look from Richie.

\- It is a gift!

He pushed Richard lightly, not wanting to make his injuries worse. He cleaned the wounds again, and when they were all clearly visible, put band-aids and other bandages on the face, arms and legs of the older boy. He finished putting a final bandage on Richie's hand, squeezed it tightly, and got one back. It was a good, cozy feeling, even if it came from a "small" gesture.

He kept his face down yet could feel Tozier's gaze burning his cheek. He had to tell Rich at once. But Richie also had revelations to Eddie.

\- Eds, I ...

\- Richie, uh ...

A silence. Cumbersome and unnecessary. They agreed to tell what they needed at once. At the same time. Counted: 1, 2, 3:

\- I think I like you! - The one with glasses sighed, still a little shaky. It was liberating and yet it caused so much fear.

\- I like you! - the other whined, feeling a probable asthma attack coming back. His eyes filled with water and his voice broke. He caught Richie's sentence. - Like me? For real?!

\- Yes, Spagheddie! Damn, did you really think that all the pet-names and affection were just "between friends"?! - He asked, with a sarcastic smile between the tears that were falling.

\- How was I supposed to know that it wasn't you joking, son of a bitch?! - he returned, restless.

The tallest grabbed Kaspbrak's face and got closer, sealing their lips. Richie waited so long for that moment, for Eddie's arms around his neck and for the approach that was taking place. Tozier came down from the sink separating the kiss and hugging the other one, spinning.

\- Eds, Eddie, _mí amoor_ ... - he hummed, as if he had won the lottery. And in a way, he did. - I love you so much, there's no way to explain ...

\- Let go of me, Richie! - he smiled, and felt a little deja vu.

\- If you kiss me... - he joked, pouting, and receiving a kiss on the cheek in response. - Not like that!

Kaspbrak laughed, hugging him back and finally putting their lips together again. They had missed the movie, probably the tickets were sold out by that time, but it had been a good day, and Richie thought that maybe the odd moments wouldn't matter anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember to leave kudos, comments and to share!


	3. Asmathic Virgin

_We used to be_

_Just like twins_

_So in sync_

_The same energy_

_Now's a dead battery_

**Katy Perry – Hot 'n Cold**

Tracing a path on the wall with his forefinger, Richie walked to the gym. The sound of sneakers hitting the floor and the constant whistle warned: it was a race day. Entering the place, Tozier looked for Eddie among the other students. While the coach drew his attention asking why he was there, Richie found the young Kaspbrak at the head of the line.

\- Mr. Wilson asked Eddie to come to his class, since it's almost time for lunch. - he said, with the most serious expression he could maintain.

The coach called for the yougest, warned him of the situation and told him to change first. Richard thanked the man with a pat on his shoulder and accompanied Eddie.

\- Wilson's sick, he hasn't been in school since Monday. Where are you really taking me, smart ass? - He asked, squeezing his arms.

\- Now, to take a shower. Or at least change clothes. Then, who knows? - He shrugged, receiving a light push in response as he opened the door.

Kaspbrak walked over to his locker and took a set of clothes off of it. Meanwhile, Tozier was sitting on a nearby bench, watching every action of the youngest with precision. He took off his shirt and shorts making Richard red and hide his face in his hands, yet opening his fingers a bit so that he could see Eddie.

He put the dirty clothes in a bag, taking the change of clothes with him. With the sound of water running from the other side of the locker room, Richie was paralyzed. Was that an invitation? No, Eddie hadn't said anything, so it wasn't. But that was weird. No, not weird. New. That's it, new! It was new to see Eddie without a shirt, without shorts, older; as he joked, 'looking like a person'.

It was funny. Richie's mental argument about children being animals and when they grew up they turned into people could distract him for hours. But it worked for a few minutes, until the water stopped and only a few uncomfortable drops were heard. He could listen to footsteps approaching as Eddie came back with wet hair and changed clothes. A piece of cloth came out of the towel that Eddie placed next to the laundry, and Richie tried not to think about what it was.

They both headed out of the school, carefully walking to the back bathroom.

New graffiti from other teenagers adorned the semi-broken mirror (Richie's favorite was one that said 'Eddie K. is an asthmatic virgin'), drawings of penises on the doors were trademarks, just like the continuing smell of cheap disinfectant.

Eddie sat at the sink and, swinging his legs, started the conversation.

\- When I was changing... Were you spying on me?

Richie swallowed.

\- No, Eddie. I looked away, seriously.

Eddie smiled in disbelief, raising an eyebrow. He gave up on the subject and pointed to his left arm.

\- I was thinking about getting a tattoo. What do you think?

\- Eddie Kaspbrak getting a tattoo? Ya' might stop takin' ya' meds as well, eh? - he laughed, mocking it with a Canadian accent. Eddie pulled his face and kissed him.

The smaller one pulled him closer, running his hands behind his neck. As the heat grew, Richie strolled his fingers under the other's yellow shirt. Tozier lowered his hands a little, driving them to the other's thighs, and preparing to unbutton his pants.

\- Rich, no. - Eddie parted his lips, still a little nervous.

\- Don't worry, I'll take it easy. I'd never hurt you. - He smiled, kissing the other's cheek.

\- I don't want to, Rich!

Richie got scared, took his hands off and walked away, giving the other more space. The smaller one was reddish and his eyes were watering.

\- Eds, forgive me, I didn't want to do that. I should have listened to you, I'm so sorry. - He said, holding Kaspbrak's hands.

\- It's okay, Richie. I understand. It's just... I'm not ready for anything serious. - He sighed, seeing a confused expression appear on the other's face.

\- Well, actually I was just going to give you a helping hand, if you get me. I wasn't asking you to be my boyfriend. - he laughed, but realized it was not funny.

\- It's just that since we started going out a few weeks ago, I thought you were ready to ask me.

\- Look, Eddie-bear, you always said you didn't want anything serious. Why'd I do the opposite of what you ask?

\- I don't know. To be honest, I think it's because sometimes you're too affectionate, hah. - He laughed, but broke his smile when he saw the other boy bothered.

\- Ah, so I'm too affectionate? Me?! You're the one who keeps asking for a hug, who holds my hand. Sure I do that too, but I'm not the only one!

\- Richie, you're overreacting.

That was it. Richard looked completely offended as he cursed the kid and left the bathroom. Despite protests to stay, Tozier was not feeling well in that environment. Not because of the smell of various repellents and chemicals together but because of the way Eddie was acting. Maybe he had a fight with someone, maybe he got tired of Richie, maybe he did badly on an exam, but in no way was it acceptable for him to throw all this over his back. And Richie wouldn't accept being a humiliated by no one. Not even Eddie.

He remembered Eddie's running shirt: number 5. Some student's number in the bathroom, 997-531. The password to Eddie's locker, 551. The 5 cabins in the bathroom. The 9 showers in the locker room. The 3 broken corners of the mirror.

\- Fuck this. - He said to himself, noticing the pattern. - Eat a dick. Really, world.

He ran to Bill's house, knocked on the door and Denbrough's mother told him he was in his bedroom with Stan. Richie stifled a laugh, wanting to maintain the woman's ignorance (who, at that moment, could be helping both a lot). He entered the space with confidence, despite the internal anger, scaring the boys, who were playing some new video game.

\- Hoh-who let you inside, Tozier?

\- If I joke about your mom, you're going to hit me, right?

\- You bet.

\- Then go ahead, I like it. - he joked, closing the door and throwing himself on the bed with the others in a dramatic way. - Eddie and I had a fight.

\- Gee, Rich. Wuh-what a bummer. - Bill commented, without taking his eyes off the TV.

\- It was taking too long. - Sighed Stan, who was trying not to touch the other.

\- What are you trying to imply, Mr Urine?

\- You guys were such a cute couple, something was going to end up wrong. It seemed too good to never fight.

As Bill grumbled against Stan's comments, Richie wondered if the Uris boy was right.

\- Yuh-you know, Rich, every couple fights once in a while. It's normal. Maybe yuh-you just need to stop a little and luh-live as i-individuals first.

\- Sometimes Bill and I have some stupid arguments, we stay away from each other, thinking about the fight and our own lives. Whoever's wrong apologizes and we're back on track. - Stan completed, celebrating his victory, showing his middle finger to Bill, who rolled his eyes. - Sometimes it's difficult, but it's easier to think of a solution if you move away from the problem a little.

Richie looked at the score. Stan won by 3x1.

Fuck off, universe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay safe, drink water, eat vegetables and get some rest! Bye bye~

**Author's Note:**

> Remember to share, leave kudos and comments plz <3  
> I'm always open for new ideas, criticism or translation tips (although be aware that the chapters are already written)  
> ;)


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